Saturday, August 22, 2015

A Man's Guide to Understanding PMS (Premenstrual Syndrome)

PMS has many levels to it for many different women. Some women never have any real noticeable symptoms, and others feel as though they become mentally ill for a few days every month, and they aren't wrong. Some symptoms are as mild as getting a little breast tenderness, and craving sweets; while others have violent uncontrollable mood swings that can eventually end a/or many relationships. The extreme is called Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD). "PMDD causes extreme mood shifts that can disrupt your work and damage your relationships (Gallenberg, 2012)."

"In both PMDD and PMS, symptoms usually begin seven to ten days before your period starts and continue for the first few days that you have your period. Both PMDD and PMS may also cause bloating, breast tenderness, fatigue, and changes in sleep and eating habits. In PMDD, however, at least one of these emotional and behavioral symptoms stands out:
  •    Sadness or hopelessness
  •    Anxiety or tension
  •    Extreme moodiness
  •    Marked irritability or anger (Gallenberg, 2012)."
PMS is a real serious issue for some. Even though it has been a long standing joke for any woman that might be in a bad mood, it is life altering for many women. Some women have cramps that are so dibilitating, most pain medications can't give them any relief. It is not unheard of for women to have to climb in bed in the fetal position, in order to have a way to cry or moan themselves to sleep. It doesn't give them relief from the pain, it's just almost impossible to maintain any other position until they find sleep.

Some women have severe headaches or migraines, until the relief of the actual onset of monthly menstruation happens. Some women get back cramps that can be mild or as dibilitating as abdominal cramps. Some women get nauseous, and that can become outright vomiting for some. Some women bloat and put on noticable weight during PMS, every month. Some women get extremely fatigued while PMSing, monthly. Many women get uncontrollable mood swings during PMS. It doesn't always matter that you know this is happening, it's just not always controllable.

My personal story is that a couple of days before my period, I get breast tenderness, I crave sweets, I get very tired one or two days leading up to my cycle, and I get moody. Some months are worst than others. When I look back on my marriage, I can say that I may have had minor issues in my relationship with my husband, and it wouldn't be such a big deal to even bring it up during non PMS days. Well, when it came to those few days before my menstrual cycle, it all of a sudden would become a BIG deal, and I may have even started a few arguments because of it. (Smile) Once my cycle began, and I would get a few days behind me, I would think back on those issues that I brought up and think to myself "Now why did you do that?", and I would feel pretty silly for doing it. It was truly out of my control.

My advice to the men that have wives who suffer from PMS, just walk away. Many women who know themselves well, will warn you to give them distance while they're PMSing. LISTEN TO THEM!!! But those who haven't really identified that they have a pretty serious PMS problem, may need you to recognize it for them, and just give them the distance that you now know they need. Understanding and recognizing this can truly save your relationship. If you notice that she has a serious issue, and she doesn't, have a talk with her after her period has gone off. Discuss with her that she needs to talk to her Dr. about it. There are many remedies that can help her, if she recognizes that she has a problem. Those women that suffer from PMDD may have more deeper issues to identify and get help for, but there is help out there for them too.

References

Gallenberg, M. M., (2012, December 12). Premenstrual syndrome (PMS). Mayoclinic.org.

Retrieved from http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/premenstrual-syndrome/expert-

answers/pmdd/faq-20058315

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